I was asked recently if I could give one tip to parents who are struggling to create unity within their families.

I thought for a moment and then said "family board meetings".

Paul and I have for a number of years have sat with our children once a week (it doesn't always work, but we try!) to discuss our home. These "state of the home" and "state of the family" meetings are a perfect time to voice concerns and questions that need to be addressed.

Children need to feel both that they are vitally important to the success of your home, (because they are) and that they have an opportunity to speak when they have questions or have a problem that needs to be addressed by the entire family.

When planning a family board meeting, there are some rules by which everyone should abide:

First, the group as a whole should be addressed by Dad. At this time, he should ask Mom if she has any questions or concerns that need to be addressed.

Only one person speaks at a time, no interrupting! Remember a family is like a puzzle, each piece fits together. It's important that each person be present and given a turn to speak.

Set a time and date for your family board meetings whether they be once a week, or once a month. Meeting at the same time each week should make it easy to schedule around.

Things to be discussed during a family board meeting:

Cover any weekly/monthly appointments

Discuss weekly/monthly family goals

Discuss problems family members are facing....this is also a good time to approach Dad with various discipline issues or homeschooling needs for the family. This also might be a good time to re-cover family rules...sometimes (especially!) little ones need to be reminded that they have guidelines that they must follow.

Discuss household problems and possible solutions. An example is that I have discussed various ways that we could reorganize our laundry procedures.

You would be amazed at the different and wonderful ideas and solutions everyone had.

This is also the time for the suggestion of possible purchases that the family might need. For instance, Courtney, who is in charge of our kitchen zone, might have a suggestion for purchasing a new appliance that would make preparation easier.

Also on the agenda should be the discussion of family vacations or trips. Let the children help with the preparations...this is a great time to get them involved.

Updates to family projects can be discussed during this meeting. On our list lately has been updates to the paint in our living room and making plans to make this happen.

This is also a wonderful time to compliment children in front of their siblings for things that they are doing well. You might recognize a child who is improving in math or has kept their room clean without being asked.

Most importantly, this is a time to pray together, as a family, over the details of family life. Pray for each family member, Dad's work, and the home.

We have come to really enjoy our family board meetings.

Please write in and let us know your ideas and thoughts!